Can you say "Angry and Stressed Out"?

Okay forgive me for I am going to vent.I am drained. I tired and I am not going to lie, I am ANGRY. Angry for so many reasons that I don't think I can list them all. The best way to put it is that I am ANGRY with the medical field. I am angry at how they can treat a human being. I am angry that I had to spend most of my day arguing and fighting for my mom and my son.

Who would have thought that things could get worse than they are? Not me. I thought that things should be looking up a bit. Let me just tell you this week has sucked. It is like I am in a constant boxing match and I continoulsy keep getting knocked down. I stand up and get knocked down. I get up and get another punch and down I go. You get the point. Who would have thought that I would have to bring my son in to the hospital to have his g tube looked at (again!!) and then have to run upstairs to my mom on another floor and deal with her being laid up in the hallway all night after being booted out of her room. This is just crazy.

So let me just recap a bit here. Just after I posted how well things were going with Wysdom we started to notice he was having some pain again with the g tube. We have called the hospital so many times that I am sure we are driving them crazy. He has pain, he's crying and no one really knows what to do. We are being cautios and watching for any sign of infection. Tuesday we had our nurse look at it. The g tube looks good but he still is in pain, so we are thinking that there maybe an infection inside again or that the last one never quite left. So the early part of the day was spent on the phone with doctors trying to decide if there is something wrong or not. So we headed into the hospital after talking to the oncall pediatrician at our local hospital. They loosened it and took x rays to see if it is still in the right placed. So far all is good. The one thing that they could not say is if there is an infection inside. From the outside it looks good...but something is not right on the inside is my guess. It's my mommy intuition.

Then after Wysdom was done we all went upstairs to see my mom who is having a procedure done today. She was admitted on Tuesday afternoon. Let me just say that it has not been a good experience. My sister and I left her at the hospital on Tuesday evening after we got my mom all settled in after intake. My sister got her a phone set up and a TV to pass the time. We unpacked a few of her things and then said our goodbyes. When I called this morning I learned from a patient that "the woman who was here yesterday got moved". No biggy, so I call the floor to get her new extension and find out if she is back from her procedure. Well they inform me that she is no longer in a room and is laying in the hallway!!!. What the >>>>! So I ask to speak to someone who then directs me to someone else and eventually to a Public Relations person. To make a long crappy story short she spent the whole night in the hallway with no phone and no easy access to a washroom. She was left unattended for several hours and we didn't get to talk to her before her surgery. The message that the nurse said she would deliver to my mom to let her know that I called and would be there soon never arrived to her. Can you imagine. To be going in for a procedure that you are already anxious about and then to be put in the hallway with the lights on all night and then not able to see or talk to your family in the morning. Oh how I complained and will complain again. There is much more that goes with this story as far as no food, no help, unsafely and negligent behaviour on behalf of some doctors. However I am sure you get the picture. Anyways in the end some things got sorted out and she finally got a bed a mere 12 hours later. Most of my anger comes from the fact that the procedure that they attempted today should have been done a month ago. I have no medical training but I know that, mmm but who will take responsibility for that?! No one!! Hopefully she is resting through the night and everything is going well.

So I am at home now feeding Wysdom and trying to recover from the last couple of days. I am praying and hoping that the morning will bring better news than today did. I am praying that there is nothing wrong with Wysdom's tube and that I don't have to make an out of town trip to another hospital in the morning and I am praying that my mom is recovering and will get out of the hospital asap. At the end of all this I have to let today's and previous days anger go. So here is what I still am grateful for. I am grateful that my mom made it through today and that the doctor that worked on her was very good. I am also grateful that my husband has been able to to watch Blyss and Wysdom when I take off to the hospital or visit my mom at home. I am grateful that I have wonderful Aunts who come running when I call for help. I am grateful that my husbands family comes down to help every weekend. I am grateful for Wysdom and Blyss. I am grateful that even though we had problems at the hospital that there is one to go to. I am grateful for mornings and fresh starts.